Thursday, 3 October 2013

A Case of The 'EX'

Was it just me or did anyone else experience a scenario where all your ex from past relationships suddenly rush for you just because they learned you were getting married?

As absurd as it may sound it actually happens, at least to me it did. They all seem to want you back, calling you non stop at all hours and pleading with you not to go with the other guy, trying to sabotage your impending marriage, promising you all the earth's riches if only you'd just come back to them.

This made me wonder, what changed? I certainly did not. Did I all to suddenly become marriageable or did the fact that someone else thought I was hastened them to think I was. Why were they so desperate? They never talked marriage when we were friends and they knew it was on my agenda, or were they just so laid back thinking to themselves that one's life resolved around them. Well, they learned a hard lesson - Time waits for no man - and I most certainly wasn't waiting for any of them. Its amusing though, watching them scramble for my attention when I'm no longer interested.

What i find hard to understand is why people prefer to hide their feelings so as not to appear weak. A boy likes a girl, they become friends. Boy(who may or may not have the money) wants to marry girl(who's dying to be proposed to by boy), he tells her and they can either get married right away or wait till they are both ready. I know I'm a big dreamer but this is how easy it should be to have a relationship. Rather what we find are people playing games and toying with other people's emotions. Boys blame girls, girls blame boys.... It just keeps getting worse.

So back to my Ex, he's somewhere sulking while I'm already taken. I'm very sure he's probably gotten over me, what  I'm not certain about is why he waited till I was taken before he made his intentions known. I guess we'll never know now because I never gave him a chance to explain. Why would I? who wants the past to haunt the future? Definitely not me.

Tuesday, 30 July 2013

How Much Sex Should Married Couples Have?

Familiarity, advancing age, work pressures, the challenges of raising a family, and household responsibilities all conspire against regular sex among many otherwise loving couples who feel too harried to get physical.

Sex is designed to make you feel good for a reason. With someone you love, It's recommend for many reasons: It's good for your health and good for your relationship. It's good for respiration, muscles, and bladder control. It's a fine antidepressant, and it can renew your energy. Staying sexually and emotionally connected on a frequent basis has merit.

Regular sex actually increases sexual desire in the couple,  In other words, the more you 'do it,' the more the individuals will seek it. You develop a desire that wasn't normally there. The act itself is reinforcing.

Couples are encouraged to have 'good enough' sex. This sets realistic expectations and often lowers anxiety. Sex is like pizza: even when it's bad, it's usually still pretty good. On a scale from one to 10, good-enough sex is between 5 and 7

Sexual attraction and sexual arousal bring to bear two very important hormones, dopamine and Oxycontin, both of which create bliss and bonding. Even if the lovemaking session started out with only a modest amount of interest, once arousal starts, these hormones create attachment, pleasure, and intimacy. So while everyday sex isn't necessary, frequent sex is a great bonus and even an essential part of most couple's commitment and happiness with one another.

Talk About Sex - The first steps towards having a better sex life is to feel comfortable talking about it. Most couples often shy away from discussing it, hence, there's a lot of sexual frustration between them. This frustration if unchecked may lead to frictions in the marriage and could cause strife and bitterness between the couples. In talking about sex, couples can discover a lot about their partner's preferences and distastes. This in turn also create a good atmosphere for other issues to be addressed.

Be Prepared - That's right get ready! who can say no to a sexy looking, good smelling, action ready you? If the sex is lacking in your marriage, then you'll have to put in more work to make it happen. Take a shower, wear on a nice fragrance, put on something sexy, get yourself in the mood and be ready to go.

Once you start, Don't stop! - When you started as as just lovers, I bet the sex was really good. Then the kids and the jobs and all the worries of marriage came in and took it's toll, then the sex declined. Once you begin to have regular sex again, try to keep it going. It's so much easier to keep a fire burning than starting up a new one.

Wednesday, 24 July 2013

The Woman is the Reflection of Her Man

A Secret of Love 

"My wife got sick. She was constantly nervous because of problems at work, personal life, her failures and problems with children. She has lost 30 pounds and weighted about 90 pounds in her 35 years. She got very skinny, and was constantly crying. She was not a happy woman. She had suffered from continuing headaches, heart pain and jammed nerves in her back and ribs. She did not sleep well, falling asleep only in the morning and got tired very quickly during the day. Our relationship was on the verge of break up. Her beauty was leaving her somewhere, she had bags under her eyes, she was poking her head, and stopped taking care of herself. She refused to shoot the films and rejected any role. I lost hope and thought that we’ll get divorced soon… But then I decided to act on it. After all I’ve got the most beautiful woman on the earth.   Angelena Jole is the ideal of more than half of men and women on earth, and I was the one allowed to fall asleep next to her and to hug her shoulders. I began to pepper her with flowers, kisses and complements. I surprised her and pleased every minute. I gave her lots of gifts and lived just for her. I spoke in public only about her. I incorporated all themes in her direction. I praised her in front of her own and our mutual friends. You won’t believe, but she has blossomed. She became even better than before. She gained weight, was no longer nervous and she loved me even more than ever. I had no clue that she can love that much".

I assume there's much debate about the authenticity of this quote, but that shouldn't steer us away from the fact that the man in the above situation fought for his marriage. He had the option of doing nothing and could later blame the woman for their imminent divorce but he chose to stay by her side, showering her with more love rather that get angry and frustrated.

Marriages are meant to be for better or worse, here we see a woman who's at her worst moment and ready to give up, but her man wouldn't let it. He nurtures her back into health and soon she blooms. Between working things out or giving up on a failing marriage, giving up is the easier of both options. Before giving up, think about how much time, effort and resources it cost to get that far, and especially where kids are involved, think also of their welfare. Before you start thinking you can always find someone else, think of how long it took you to find the one your planning to walk away from, think of all the troubles you had starting out and how fewer quarrels you've had over the years. Is walking out really the best solution? Troubled times are always rough, but it's the great moments that should linger longer in the heart.

Women generally want 3 basic things from their men - His unconditional Love, Care and Attention. Trust me guys, if she gets all this from you, she will be anything you want her to be.

Tuesday, 23 July 2013

4 Things Single People Should Know Before Getting Married

Rights of Couples Before and After Marriage:

As single individuals, it’s our utmost right to live as we like so long as it conforms to the rules and obligations of the Society. We can live as carefree as we deem fit, but when we finally get married, most of this right is no longer applicable. This is not because our spouses say so, but rather as a result of careful consideration for our partners.

Below are some of the Rights we have and how they may change after marriage.
      Freedom of Independence; as a single person, your totally free to do as you wish, date whoever you desire, go wherever you wish when you wish to and how you which to, you owe no one no explanations for your actions. But when you finally get married, I’m afraid you can no longer do as you wish. You can’t go anywhere without informing your partner, you most certainly can no longer date, and whatever plans you make, you make with your partner.  When you truly love your partner, sharing such information would be pleasant. You would want him/her to know your plans and whereabouts – this builds trust, you would want to go everywhere with them – this shows you are proud of them, and you would surely want to stop seeing the Ex – your Ex is your past, your marriage is your future, which way would you rather go? 
        Some Friends Have Got to Go; It’s ok to keep all sorts of friends when your single, the bad ones make you have fun while the good ones keep you in check, but when you get married, the should be no room for bad friends in your life. You don’t want to come home and find your friend messing around with your partner – trust me, this happens a lot –, you don’t want such friends giving you advice when marital issues arise either. So it’s best you keep them at arm’s length or better still, cut them off.
      I’m Always Right; we all have that little voice in our heads telling us we are always right. Are we? Really? Being single, your voice may be all you want to hear but this must change when you get married, i.e., if you want to have a peaceful marriage.  Sacrifice and Compromise they say makes a marriage sail smoothly, and for you to have this, your partner’s voice may sometimes have to supersede yours. 
      My Income is Mine; yea sure it’s yours and you can go on a spending spree for all anyone cares, but I’m afraid that will definitely have to change after marriage unless of course the income is a very big fat one. In marriage, everything should be shared, including income. This is for the general welfare of the family, and this particularly brings couples together because almost every aspect of running a family involves spending. The burden is always lighter when two people share it.

Being single is cool, It’s a fun, exciting and spontaneous period in our lives. No one says our marriages can’t be same, it could equally be as fun, the only difference is doing it all with a partner, after all, what one person can do, two people will do even much better.

Thursday, 18 July 2013

Kemdi's Blog: Marriage Turns a Girl-child Into a Woman?

Kemdi's Blog: Marriage Turns a Girl-child Into a Woman?: What a joke! So a 14yr old suddenly becomes a woman just because some unconscientious man decides to make a wife out of her or her greedy ...

Marriage Turns a Girl-child Into a Woman?

What a joke! So a 14yr old suddenly becomes a woman just because some unconscientious man decides to make a wife out of her or her greedy parents give her out for whatever insane reason. Do they really know the implications of this singular action?

One minute she's gathering toys in her cute little bedroom and in the next instant, she's thrust into the care of her so called husband and her faith now lies entirely at his mercy. She's had no prior training, her mind isn't even fully developed to grasp the concept of marriage, yet she's suddenly the care taker of a home.

Most ladies find it hard enough being married, so how's this girl-child supposed to cope? What happens when she gets to his house? Has she even had a sex talk with her mother? What does she know about running a home? Has she discovered herself and what she will be? A million questions prowl through my mind as i ponder this, and I'm terribly saddened not only for the poor child that will be unluckly to find herself in this situation, but for the society at large.

When we begin to add or remove clauses in the constitution that works against children,one can only imagine what the future holds for our unborn little ones. We turn our eyes away from real issues bugging our society at large and begin to adjust our Laws so that it favors a few.

People have done a lot of things (good and bad ) under the guise of religion, let's not endanger the future of our children under the same guise. Knowing how Nigeria works, any form of evil that's given room always escalates. Soon parents will start giving out their under aged children and quote the law for you. Some men will start abusing young girls under the same guise that they want to marry them. The streets will no longer be safe for our young daughters, immorality will soon spread into our junior secondary schools ( I'm assuming it's common knowledge that immorality has swept through our senior secondary schools), and the list goes on.

Denying any individual a childhood no matter how poor is one of the greatest wrongs that can be inflicted on such a child. Not only is their innocence lost forever, these children are left at the mercy of our harsh society.

Enough said! What are your thoughts on this?
Click here to watch video

Wednesday, 17 July 2013

What Was I Thinking???

I ask myself everyday, what on earth was i thinking when I quit my job? Some decisions just come back to bite you in the ass, this one was surely one of them.

For some insane reason, i decided to quit my job. Maybe it was because I was still basking in the euphoria of being newly married, or that i was head over heels in love and so I wanted to spend every minute of each passing day with him. Whatever it was that possessed me to make that decision has long gone, and now that I am back to reality, I wish i hadn't.

Being jobless is the worst feeling in the world. Not only are you bored, it makes you feel like you are such a burden to everyone around, it's especially worse when you are newly married. These days, guys want ladies that are independent, even your in-laws appreciate you more when you are working. If i had known how quickly confidence goes with loosing one's independence, I would have had a re-think on that decision.

Here I am feeling sorry and miserable when I could have been in the office working and being relevant. Money saved up in the bank is quickly being depleted because there's no longer any steady income, boredom is beginning to get the better of me and my mind starts to plays tricks on me. I start lashing out at my hobby, looking for who to blame for my mistake, and when things started heating up between us, i had to pinch myself to stop before I ruin it all.

Spending 24hrs with the same person can be fun, but it can also be terribly boring. You soon run out of things to say and before long you start saying the wrong things which could then turn ugly. Don't get me wrong, the love is still strong and solid, its just the boredom. The saying "An idle mind is the Devil's workshop" has never been more vividly clearer to me. When I working, I used to look forward to going home because i had a lot of gist, now we stayed home all day watching TV and occasionally going out.

Nobody had to tell me to start looking for another job, especially when i planned to take a trip only to realize my account balance wasn't sufficient to get me a Visa. Dear God, I pray, please help me to get a new job ASAP. Amen!

To all ladies out there, before you quit your job for whatever reason, please ensure you have plan B and if possible C. I realized that you first have to be happy before you can make anyone happy. Learn from my mistake, don't make yours.

Tuesday, 16 July 2013

Baby Watch Fever!

The world is awaiting the arrival of the royal baby, and according to Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall, we don't have to wait too much longer!

On Monday, Prince Charles' wife reportedly told well-wishers at Little Harbour children's hospice, located near St. Austell, Cornwall, that the family expects Kate Middleton to give birth "by the end of the week."

"We are all just waiting by the telephone," Camilla said in an impromptu speech. "We are hopeful that by the end of the week he or she will be here."

The world can't definitely wait for sure, check out the campers outside the hospital where she will be delivered, LOL.

Monday, 15 July 2013

Theology of Marriage: Marriage as a Natural Institution.

What is marriage?
Marriage is the intimate, exclusive, indissoluble communion of life and love entered by Man and Woman at the design of the Creator for the purpose of their own good and the procreation and education of Children.

Intimate Communion of Life and Love
Marriage is the closest and most intimate of human friendships. Marriage calls for a mutual self-surrender so intimate and complete that spouses - without loosing their individuality - become "One", not only in body, but in soul. It involves the sharing of the whole of a person's life with his or her spouse.

Exclusive Communion of Life and Love
As a mutual gift of two persons to each other, this intimate union excludes such union with anyone else. It demands the total fidelity of the spouses. This exclusivity is essential for the good of the couples children as well.

Indissoluble Communion of Life and Love
Marriage was created for eternity, all couples entering into it do so for better and for worse. Couples who think about a way out should not be considering getting married. Marriage intends for couples to stay together no matter what, hence, the churches stance on courtship.
At the Design of the Creator
God is the author of Marriage. He inscribed the call to marriage in our very being by creating us male and female. Marriage is governed by His laws faithfully carried out by His bride - The Church.  

For the Purpose of their own Good
"It is not good that man should be alone" (Gen 2:18) Conversely, it;s for their own good, for their benefit, enrichment and ultimately their salvation, that a man and a woman join their lives in marriage. Marriage is the most basic expression of the vocation to love that all men and women have as person's made in God's image.

For Procreation and Education of Children
"By their very nature, the institution of marriage itself and conjugal love are ordained for the procreation and education of children and find in them their ultimate crown". Children are not added unto marriage and conjugal love, but spring from the very heart of the spouses mutual self-giving, as its fruit and fulfillment. Intentional exclusion of children then contradicts the very nature and purpose of marriage.

Finally, Sacred Scriptures begins with the creation of man and woman in the image and likeness of God, and ends with a vision of " The Wedding Feast of the Lamb".

Marriage Advice We Learned From Movies

Over the last 100 years of movie history, our favorite onscreen couples have given us a lot of
advice about what it takes to have a happy marriage. Sure, not all of it's good advice (you probably wouldn't want to base your marriage off Michael and Kay's union in 
"The Godfather"), but some have been surprisingly poignant. Below are just but a few:

"When Harry Met Sally": Love Your Partner's Quirks
You say you love your spouse -- but do you really love EVERYTHING about him (or her)? Harry (Billy Crystal) isn't yet married to Sally (Meg Ryan) in this scene from the 1989 movie "When Harry Met Sally", but he still teaches us the importance of loving your partner's little quirks. "I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend the day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes," he says.

"Up": Cherish The Little Moments
The opening scene of 2009 animated film "Up" is a sweet reminder of all the ordinary moments that make up a marriage, like saving money and decorating your first house. Don't forget the day-to-day struggles and joys of marriage in between the bigger milestones.

"The Kids Are All Right": Marriage Is Hard
Being married isn't always easy, especially when you've been together for many years. In the 2010 movie "The Kids Are All Right", Jules (Julianne Moore) explains, "Marriage is hard... Just two people slogging through the shit, year after year, getting older, changing. It's a marathon, okay?"

"The Birdcage": Remember That You Make A Great Team
In the 1996 comedy "The Birdcage", Albert (Nathan Lane) wants to pretend to be heterosexual to fool his future in-laws. His partner, Armand (Robin Williams) protests at first, but then relents, declaring, "You're a great performer, I'm a great director. Together we can do almost anything." When you and your spouse work together, you're unstoppable!

"Gone With The Wind": Don't Forget To Say "I Love You"
All of Scarlett (Vivien Leigh) and Rhett (Clark Gable)'s problems could have been avoided if they had both admitted how much they truly loved each other in the 1939 classic "Gone With The Wind". Scarlett tries to tell Rhett that she loves him in the movie's final scene, but it's too late.

"Julie & Julia": Be Supportive
While Julia Child (Meryl Streep) tries to figure out her passion, her husband, Paul (Stanley Tucci), supports her throughout her journey in 2009 movie "Julie & Julia". "What is it that you really like to do?" he asks in the clip on the left. Even when most women didn't have careers, he encouraged Julia to follow her dreams.

"Shrek": Always Believe Your Partner Is Beautiful
In 2001 movie "Shrek", Fiona says, "I'm supposed to be beautiful," when she realizes she won't turn from an ogre back into a human. "But you ARE beautiful," Shrek replies, just as any loving husband (or wife) should. No matter what you look like, your spouse should always think you're gorgeous.

How to teach your kids to be grateful

 Learning to be grateful is an essential part of living a happy life and it's something that can easily be instilled
in children from a very young age.

To learn more about teaching gratitude we turned to Allison Bates, a registered clinical counsellor and the owner of Westcoast Counselling Services in Vancouver.

"Teaching children about gratitude is important because it helps them to not have a sense of entitlement and to appreciate what they have," she explains.

Here she shares some simple, yet helpful tips on how to teach your children to be grateful.

1. Start teaching your kids early
Children can begin to grasp the concept of being thankful even as toddlers. This is why it's important to start teaching them about gratitude from the get-go, says Bates. But keep in mind that your kids' ideas of gratitude will change as they grow up.

"The language and how it is discussed can evolve and change as they get older," Bates explains. "It's also important to note toddlers are developmentally in a stage where they are self-centred -- so keep your expectations reasonable and look at the bigger, long-term picture. Teaching about gratitude is a long-term goal, not something that can be done in one sitting."

2. Practise being thankful on a daily basis
Teaching your children about gratitude is something that can easily be worked into your everyday life as a family.

"For example, using manners and saying "thank you" when you or your child receives something is a good start," says Bates. Children are always looking to their caregivers as role models, so it's important that you as a parent behave in a way you would like your children to pick up, she notes.

Bates also suggests having a moment every day -- either at the end of the day, at the dinner table or at bedtime -- where you share what you were thankful, happy or grateful for that day.

"This can help your child reflect on their day and, if it's part of their routine, they also begin to look for things they are thankful for so they can talk about it at the end of the day," she explains.

3. Don't be afraid to say "no" to your kids
It's natural to want to give things to your children and make them happy; however practising saying "no" is an important aspect of teaching kids about gratitude.

"If you are always giving into your child's wants, they don't learn to appreciate when they do get something they really want," says Bates.

When children get whatever they want, they develop feelings of self-entitlement, she explains. Saying "no" not only teaches them about gratitude, but it shapes the ways they see the world and encourages them to interact within it in a more positive way.

4. Focus on experiences, not stuff
"The more we give our children, the less they appreciate." If you've caught yourself saying or thinking something similar, Bates suggests switching your focus to experiences rather than material things. Children generally value time with their loved ones and experiences more than things, she explains.

"I would also suggest looking into an experience where your child donates some of their belongings to a less fortunate family or volunteers in some capacity depending on their age," she says. "By doing these things – having conversations and asking them what they learned from these experiences – you are teaching them gratitude."

5. Prioritize teaching gratitude
Teaching gratitude is an important part of parenting, so it's a good idea to make it a habit. "It creates socially conscious, caring individuals that are aware of others and their perspectives," says Bates.

Teaching gratitude also shows your child how to put themselves in another person's shoes, she explains. "This is a very important skill," Bates says.

Does Size Really Matter?

The Doctors take on the age-old debate: Does a man’s size affect his results in the bedroom?

“Whether you’re a wide receiver, or you go long, it really doesn’t matter. It’s what you do with what you have,” OB/GYN Dr. Lisa Masterson says. “Women can orgasm from so many different erogenous zones, and the more that a partner knows their partner’s erogenous zones, the more they’ll be able to do with what they have,” she adds.

“Penis sizes are different.” E.R. physician Dr. Travis Stork says. “The average penis length, when not erect, for men, is 3-and-a-half inches. Most men are between 5-and-a-half and 6.2 inches when erect." In extremely rare cases, men can suffer from a condition called microphallus, which may require a penile enlargement procedure; however, most surgeons caution against undergoing this procedure, as the results are far from perfected and men are often left with deformities.

Plastic surgeon Dr. Andrew Ordon explains that there really is no tried and true method to increase the size of your penis. “So, lose some weight, get those abs in shape, [do] a little manscaping and [your penis] is going to look a lot [bigger]," he says.

Anatomically Speaking ...
Dr. Lisa explains that the average woman’s vagina is approximately four inches long and the average man’s penis is approximately five to six inches when erect, and three to four inches when flaccid; therefore, size is really a moot point. Dr. Lisa encourages men to concentrate on the other ways they can satisfy and pleasure a woman, rather than focus on the size of their genitalia.

Is Penis Size Hereditary? 

Penises come in different sizes, shapes, and colors. These traits are hereditary, like eye color or foot size, and there's nothing you can do to change them. Despite what you may hear or read, no special exercises, supplements or diets will speed up the development process or change the size.

Measuring Up
A measurement of the female anatomy may mean the difference between "Oh ..." and "OH!"

"Research suggests that the clitoral-vaginal distance, and I'm just reporting what I've read," Dr. Travis says, "is that the optimal distance is 2.5 centimeters [apart] to have an orgasm."

If the distance between the hood of the clitoris and the vaginal opening is shorter than 2.5 centimeters, the movement of the penis will create more friction and increase the chance of orgasm.

"So many women think they can have orgasms just by sex alone," Dr. Lisa says. "Seventy-five percent of women, most women, do not have orgasm by [vaginal] sex alone.

"People ask, ‘Which one is better: a clitoral orgasm or a vaginal orgasm?'" Dr. Lisa states. "It really doesn't matter. An orgasm is an orgasm. We have to be more sex-positive, because women who are more positive about their bodies are going to have more orgasms.

The Doctors have spoken, so guys, its not about the size but actually performance that determines if she comes or not.

Kelly Osbourne Is Engaged to Matthew Mosshart!

She's officially off the market! 
Kelly Osbourne is engaged to her boyfriend of two years, Matthew Mosshart, according to Daily Mail.
The two, who have dodged engagement rumors for months, originally met at Kate Moss' wedding in July 2011.
In May, the Fashion Police star gushed about her relationship with the vegan chef on the pages of Cosmopolitan.
"He just wants to love me, and I just want to be loved by him," she said at the time. 
She also revealed that there's been something different, and special, about Mosshart from the very start of their highly publicized relationship.
"Every single other guy I've dated has wanted something from me. They'd call people I know and ask for favors. I'd have to say, 'Trust me. Telling someone you are my boyfriend isn't going to get you very far.'"
And while the 28-year-old should be gearing up for the beginning stages of wedding prep, she confessed that she's already put thought into starting a family with her beau. 
The always outgoing Osbourne touched upon one of her biggest concerns with having a child, saying, "I do want babies, but I don't want a great big vagina!"
Just last month, the lavender-haired beauty made an appearance on Good Morning America and confessed that Mosshart "is the one." 

We wish you all the best Kelly.

Friday, 12 July 2013

Another Addition to the Family???

Finally, this playboy may be settling down.
E! News reports...

"There might be a new addition to the royal family soon—and no, we're not taking about Kate Middleton and Prince William's baby.

Prince Harry and Cressida Bonas are getting pretty close. In fact, a source tells E! News exclusively that the pair are "definitely more in love than ever," adding, "I would not be surprised if she's the one he marries."
"They are very affectionate with one another when they are with their friends," adds the source. "They kiss and cuddle and just seem head over heels for one another. They both have the same sense of fun and adventure. They're on the same wavelength. They are so compatible."

And Harry's ex-girlfriend is apparently more than OK with his new romance. "It's not awkward with Chelsy Davy at all," says a source. "Chelsy and Cressida have become firm friends nowadays."
"It's different dating a royal and getting used to that life and the challenges it brings," adds a source. "Chelsy is someone that Cressida can talk to about her unique situation. Chelsy has a man of her own anyhow."

On June 22, Prince Harry, Cressida, and Chelsy attended the wedding of Melissa Percy and Thomas van Straubenzee. Prince William (sans Kate, who was on maternity leave), Pippa Middleton and Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie also showed up for the royal affair.

A source tells E! News it was actually Eugenie who introduced Harry, 28, and Cressida, 24. "Cressida is really smart, very naturally pretty and just a really cool girl to hang out with. It's hard for Harry to date as there are so many opportunities out there, but Cressida is someone he knows he can trust as she is already in his circle," adds a source.
She also comes from a prominent family. Her mother is Lady Mary-Gaye Georgiana Lorna Curzon, a darling among Tatler and the British society pages. She's also the half-sister of actress Isabella Anstruther-Gough-Calthorpe, who married Richard Branson's son Sam in March 2013.

So clearly, she fits right in to royal life. And Princess Cressida has a lovely ring to it!"

Good luck to them.

How To Fix A Marriage

If your marriage is on the rocks and you need help to fix it, you should calculate your moves and go ahead with patience as the wrong act may mar the relationship and worsen matters. In case you are wondering how to fix your marriage, these tips can help:

Take responsibility and open communication channels
Pent up grudges, emotions, pride and past differences may often create problems in a marriage, which if unexplained, can have a mothball effect and grow into bigger issues of concern. So, if you have felt hurt at any action or word of your partner, vent your feelings by taking an open communicational channel. Remember that your partner is not a thought reader and sulking without discussing the matter is not going to break any ice. So, don't shy away from discussing the matter. In case you are at fault, take responsibility and ask for forgiveness. Identifying the problem areas and discussing it without any prejudices is the key to fixing a marriage that is going the wrong way.
Bring back the passion
Once you have settled down with your partner and have kids, romance and passion often take a backseat. Lack of romance and sex can spell doom in a relationship. If you find the same happening with your marriage, take corrective measures now. Going on a date again with your spouse, bringing him/her the favorite gift, leaving little love notes laying around the house, hiring a babysitter to steal some couple time are ways to make your partner feel loved again. Doing little things like rustling up a yummy breakfast for your partner, taking him on a short trip, booking a relaxing spa massage etc are some other ways to rekindle the lost passion. You can even plan to cuddle near the fireplace, have a hot tub bath together or the like followed by passionate sex to heighten your romantic escapades.
Participate actively in your spouse’s life
In case it’s your aloofness to your partner that's making things go awry, try to develop interest in your partner’s life. Try to make him/her the most important person in your life. Listen to how his/her day went, his/her needs and problems etc and let your partner feel that you are beside him/her to share every up and down of life. In other words, offer the utmost respect to your spouse and grow old together. A time will then come when you become best friends and would enjoy the life to its fullest.
Seek professional help
If despite your best efforts, you fail to bridge the gap and the marriage seems to be heading towards the much dreaded D word (read divorce), don't hesitate in seeking professional counseling sessions. There's no stigma in going to a marriage counselor and getting professional advice to mend things and bring them back to normal. So, once you feel the need for the same, don't shy away from fixing an appointment with a marriage counselor due to social pressures or other reasons. Just go ahead as this is your marriage at stake and you should give it all that it takes to make it strong and a long lasting bond.
So, just have patience, and use these steps to bring back the spark in your marriage, which in turn will surely fix your marriage that's going awry.

Last but definitely not least, Pray!
There's nothing impossible for God, He made manna fall in the desert, He also paved a way in the middle of the sea, He will surely come to your aid.

Thursday, 11 July 2013

There’s a shocking report that Denzel allegedly cheated on his wife of thirty years, Pauletta, and now she’s considering filing for divorce.

It sounds like Denzel Washington might be in the dog house! The 58-year-old actor’s marriage is reportedly crumbling over his infidelity. Denzel has been married to Pauletta Washington, 62, for 30 years, and despite their happy united front and two children together, the actor’s wife is allegedly sick of him cheating on her!

                      Denzel Washington’s Marriage On The Rocks?

The Flight star was reportedly spotted cozying up to a blonde at a house party in Malibu recently, and now there are allegedly four photos being shopped around to various media outlets. The pictures are said to show Denzel kissing the unidentified young woman.
Denzel and his wife have been married for three decades and Pauletta recently spoke about their marriage to Ebony magazine.

“I live with this man. I see the down part. I see the sad part. I see every part. He has and knows he has stability in me as his wife. That’s what gives him strength, regardless if he misuses it. I can’t dwell on that. But I do know that gives him a great platform to go and fly.”

This is not the first time that Denzel has been accused of cheating on his wife. In 2003 there were reports that the actor was having an affair with his Out of Time co-star Sanaa Latham.
Pauletta is reportedly in NYC while Denzel is at the family home in LA. She is said to be contemplating filing for divorce. The couple married in 1983 after meeting on the set of his first film, Wilma.

This is just heart breaking, soon they'll be no more Hollywood marriages to keep our hopes up that not all celeb marriages will end in divorce.
Will and Jada Smith, I'm still rooting for you guys. 
Who's your favorite Hollywood couple? And if you were in Pauletta Washington's shoes, what would you do?

Things I wish my partner would do more often

He says:

“Drag” us to a chick flick
Truth is (sshhhh!), some of them are actually good. "Julie & Julia"? Heartwarming. "Twilight"? Go Team
Jacob! And you’re our only excuse to watch them. But don’t abuse this privilege. We really don’t want to see that "Eat, Pray, Love" movie, and we mean it. Even the most sensitive dude has no interest in watching Julia Roberts bond with elephants.

Be over-the-top girly
Sure, we love it when you down a few pints and watch the game with us. But we also love all your girly habits that we make fun of. Shrieking at mosquitoes, pink flip-flops, medicine cabinets filled with things like kiwi shampoo. We ridicule because it's cute. We like that you're scared of spiders, and we like that you trust us to kill them for you. Oh, and we love the smell of that shampoo.

Pick up the tab
Sheesh, why the stink eye? I’m just being honest. Look, we’re big believers in chivalry, and we usually want to pay. But sometimes, every now and then, it’s nice to be treated.

Take us shopping
In case you’re worried – “Maybe he’ll resent me for trying to dress him” – I’m here to tell you, not a chance. We trust your taste, and we don’t have strong opinions – or any opinions really – on denim. So please, pick out our clothes for us. Just do it quickly. We hate the actual shopping part.

She says:

Tear up during movies
OK, so it typically only occurs at the end of sports-themed flicks like "Rudy" and "Remember the Titans," but nonetheless, it sure is cute to see that deep down, you’re just a big old softie.

Use our products
We can’t help but smile to ourselves every time we realize our coconut body cream or BiorĂ© strips aren’t in the same place we left them. Just stay away from the makeup, OK?

Order dessert
I’ll let you in on a little secret: We may say we don’t want dessert, but we want dessert. So order the tiramisu. You see, there’s this rule: The calories don’t count when you’re eating off his plate. So please, feel free.

Bust a move

We relish those rare occasions when you decide to show off your moves on the dance floor. Even if your Michael Jackson impression is slightly mortifying, it’s nice to see you let loose (ahem, with your clothes on).

I particularly love it when my Boo surprising makes dinner, will it be too much to wish it happened more frequently? Anyway, I think I'll take him shopping soon.
What are you doing?

Should couples live together before marriage?

There are many milestones in a relationship that get your heart pumping. The first time you kiss. The inaugural "I love you." Exchanging apartment keys. Meeting the parents. And, a very big one: moving in together.

Whether it's a prelude to marriage, replaces an exchange of vows, or happens only after the big day, eventually two people in love will want to share a home. But if marriage is the plan, should a couple co-habitate beforehand?

We asked around to find out what people like you really think.

No, you should not live together before marriage:
"I don't think couples should. Life has very few really special events and living with each other before marriage makes the actual wedding just a formality." – Lenny D., 36, Toronto

"I don't think it's necessary. There have been lots of marriages that have worked without the couple living together beforehand." – David Payne, 46, Toronto

“No, living together before you get married is a bad idea. It's wrong, for religious reasons. Also, so many of my peers are jumping into cohabitation in their 20's, but this is the time of life where you should be exploring who you are, what it's like to be independent, how to pay your own bills and get by on your own, that sort of thing.” – Avery S., 25, Montreal

"I don't think it is a good idea to live together before marriage for practical reasons. For example, my condo is too small for a second person to move in. I'd have to sell it if I decided to live with someone. I'm not willing to go through a major real estate transaction for an experimental living arrangement. And 'experimental' is how I view a plan to live together then maybe get married." – Penny, 32, Toronto

Yes, you should live together
"I wouldn't consider marriage without living together first. Living together you get a chance to know a person's day-to-day routine, see the highs and lows, and discover things about them that you won't necessarily learn from merely dating. You get to make sure you're truly compatible in all ways. At this stage in my life, I don't want to just go on blind faith." – Steve G., 43, Toronto

"Moving in with your spouse only once you've tied the knot is asking for disappointment and inviting unnecessary stress on what should be a time for two people to seal a permanent bond with each other. It seems irresponsible and almost naive for couples to expect that their vows will be strong enough to see them through the rough spots, especially if you have to experience them all at once. Before living together, we're really only seeing two dimensions of our partner's personality – the third dimension might just prove to be more than one can handle." – Stephanie Bratt, 29, Mississauga, Ont.

In my opinion, I think its up to the couple involved. I know a couple who lived together for 10yrs and still did not get married, and also another couple who barely knew each other for a little over 2 weeks and are still happily married. But this is just my humble opinion, what's yours?

What Makes a Successful Marriage?

In talking with couples who have been married for many years, these aspects of marriage (not listed in any type of priority) are listed as necessary for a long lasting marriage.

    •  Continue to build intimacy -- both sexually and emotionally -- throughout your marriage.
    •  Create passion for life and for one another.
    •  Forgive one another. Don't hang on to past baggage and past hurts. Be willing to let go and to move forward with your lives.
    •  Continue to be committed to each other and celebrate your sense of commitment.
    •  Like one another and be friends with each other.
    •  Be open to compromise.
    •  Have fun together, laugh together, and use humor in healthy ways.
    •  Comfort, encourage, and affirm one another.
    •  Be able to stand on your own feet as a couple and not be dependent either financially or emotionally on either of your parents.
    •  Respect one another's need for privacy and space.
    •  Parent together.
    •  Deal with a crisis and adversity together.
    •  Fight fair.
    •  Accept your differences and don't try to change your spouse.
    •  Keep romance alive in your marriage.

    In our busy lives we tend to forget what's really important when trying to keep up with deadlines and busy schedules, finding a good balance between the kids, the job and our spouses is really crucial.

    Watching my grand-parents who celebrated their golden jubilee not too long ago, i've learned that your spouse may probably be the only thing you'll have left when you get old. You eventually retire from your job, the kids grow up and leave home and once again its just the two of you.

    So let's be determined today to make our marriages work, after all,happy marriages produce happy children, happy children grow up to be happy adults and the cycle just keeps going around.

    Wednesday, 10 July 2013

    Marriage Things.... Pt. 2

    As Dili angrily walked out of the house, she wanted nothing more than to punch something, or break something or yell, she just wanted to release all the anger that was welled up inside her. Her mum sure knows how to press all her buttons, she thought, having the same conversations everyday was beginning to piss her off.

    Storming out of the house was probably the best thing because she would have said something that she might regret and that would be bad. A part of her knew that her mum was right but she wouldn't dare admit it, at least not to her mum. What her mum did not know is how hard she was trying. Finding a guy was hard enough, but finding one with all the qualifications that her family would accept was incredibly difficult.

    All the boys she met all wanted one thing - sex. The rest were either unmarriageable or married. It was frustrating and even more so that she couldn't share this with her mum. It was hard finding a good guy, much less finding an Igbo one who was both educated and Catholic. You eventually meet a guy and before long he starts pressuring you to have sex with him, when you resist he starts acting funny and before you know it your relationship is on rocky grounds. You eventually give in but 6 months into the relationship you realize your not compactible enough to continue so you move on, then you meet someone else and start all over again and before you know it you are 25 and still not only single, but also searching.

    How would her mum understand? The last time she tried to discuss it with her, they ended up arguing about how choosy she was, how stubborn she had grown over the years making it very difficult for men to see her marriageable qualities. So its my fault now that i'm still single, Dili thought, is it a crime to find a nice caring and romantic guy who can take care of me? She asked herself, marriage is a life time commitment and Dili could not imagine spending the rest of her life with the guys she had dated in the past. That's not being choosy, it's being careful.

    Dili knew she wasn't getting any younger, but she would be damned if she caved under the pressure and settled for any guy. He had to be good-looking, tall, hard working and God fearing, not forgetting her mum's own criteria - Catholic and Igbo. Is this too much ask for in a man? As the years went by, the list of criteria grew shorter but she wasn't going to make it shorter anymore. If she could not find a man with it all, then she would consider her other options. The idea wasn't a pleasing one to Dili, but if she had learned anything over the years, it was to have plan B & C.

    .... excuse me, hello, hellllooooo..., Dili snapped out of her thoughts and realised someone had been trying to get her attention. She looked around and realised that she had walked a great distance away from her house, she looked up at the guy and her gaze fell upon the most handsome face she had seen in ages. His eyes were smiling and looked friendly, his smile took her breath away. She closed her eyes hoping he'd still be there when she opened them again, said a silent prayer and opened them again. He was still there looking perfect, smelling wonderful and smiling at her. She smiled back and extended her hands to shake his already extended hands.

    Hello, he said again, seems you were lost in your thoughts, been trying to get your attention for a while now. Is everything ok?

    Dili nodded, words failed her at that moment, she was so mesmerized by his appearance, it was if the Heavens read her mind and knew exactly what she was longing for.

    Good, he continued, I was speaking with my friends when you passed us by and I told myself that I must get to know you. You are the prettiest girl I have ever seen, he told her, and I would love to know you. My name is Afam, i'm from Enugu, what's yours?

    To be cont......